Skip to main content

Saying Goodbye

From the earliest days of married life, you watched from the window as the Gingerbread Man left.

You watched him as he left to walk to class. You watched him as he got in the car to drive to work -- the Honda, then the Subaru, then the Saturn, then the Ford.

After the Ford became scrap metal, he biked to school. Four years of biking year-round in Michigan -- it's no wonder you watched him back then; he might have returned to you as an icicle. When degrees were granted and school was finished, you watched him drive away in the Toyota as he went to claim the other side of the desk at the university. Sometimes, you watched him commute again by bike, though not in winter.

You've watched all these years, catching a last glimpse as your love went away for the day. Coat on, a skip in his step, car door slammed or a bike helmet clipped on. Sometimes he sees you and smiles and waves. Often he doesn't, and you watch unobserved from the window.

When you've watched until the last wheel is out of sight, you turn to your work of the day.

When the gingerbread boys came along, you began watching them as they left. When you walk the youngest gingerbread boy to school, you leave him at the edge of the school yard and watch him as he walks down the school's sidewalk. On the days he takes the bus carrying his enormous trombone, you watch until the bus is a yellow blur through the trees.

Somehow you feel incomplete if you leave before they do, if you leave before you get to watch them as the school bus drives off. Somewhere deep in your mind, it seems as if your mere presence at their departure is enough to ward off any danger they might chance upon during the day.

You know that's silly, but you remain visually tethered to them until they're gone. You know the day will come when the gingerbread boys will leave for a long time, for college, for travel, for a wife. And when they do, you'll be watching out the window until you can't see anymore.

Labels

Labels:

Comments

  1. JulieOctober 18, 2013 at 11:07 PM

    Do you ever drop-kick them on their way a bit? :)

    Lovely post.

    ReplyDelete
  2. karenOctober 20, 2013 at 7:50 PM

    So often, you write what's in my heart. The scene is different but the feelings are so familiar - you might be trained to write for young adults but I think you instinctively write for women and mothers.

    ReplyDelete
  3. AnonymousNovember 7, 2013 at 1:17 AM

    Beautiful, Ginger...and so true!
    (writersideup)

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Hot Chocolate with Whipped Cream

Each morning, you stand by the window watching your boys until they're on the bus or picked up. You watch them leave your circle of safety and hope for the best. You can't know what that day will bring. Nothing, maybe. Or maybe a bomb threat. Maybe a math test. Maybe a lockdown drill. Or maybe a real lockdown. But on this day, there is something different. A rally. A walk-out. A demonstration. Your oldest son asked if you'd call to have him dismissed and bring him downtown to attend the demonstration. You want your voice to be heard, and even more, you want your son's voice to be heard, so you call the school, you pick him up, you drive downtown. You don't know what to expect, but the reality makes you weepy. A crowd of teenagers, many carrying hand-drawn signs stand gathered in front of the church, chanting. Adults congregate around the edges. A band plays, keeping time for the chants. Horns honk as their drivers show support. One man in a truck wags his fi...
2 comments
Read more

The Sky is Everywhere Contest!

I first heard Jandy Nelson read an excerpt from The Sky is Everywhere during her graduate reading at Vermont College of Fine Arts. The words absolutely sizzled from her lips, and I couldn't wait to read the whole thing. Unfortunately, I had to wait until the publishing world caught up. When I read the finished book, I started it over and read it again. Then I bought a copy to give to my sister. (Yes, I GAVE it to my sister.) Now, thanks to a pay-it-forward contest, I am soon to have my very own copy and give away yet another copy. Casey McCormick began a pay-it-forward book contest for The Sky is Everywhere in an effort to spread the love, and to generate new sales for a talented author. Her contest inspired other contests, one of which was sponsored by Melissa Writes Fiction , and I won that contest. Yippee! So, to make good on my promise, here is my own pay-it-forward contest. Please read the rules below, because this contest is a bit different. The most important condi...
5 comments
Read more

The Greening

Sadness spreads like a sower scattering seeds. The seeds find fertile ground in her and land there, burrowing into her skin, into the deep down places where they sprout, nurtured unwittingly by blood and bone. Shoots spread forth growing both inward and outward, and she wonders if she will ever be able to root them all out. It is like pulling at a dandelion only to have stem detach from root and downy fluff fly off, enabling dozens more dandelions to take root. There is no cause for the sadness; it just is, like cold in winter, like leaves in fall, like rain in April. It sits there, within her, growing bigger each day, a pregnancy gone horribly wrong, and she feels the shame of it. But a breeze blows by, bringing different seeds, renegade seeds, hopeful seeds. They sprout in the midst of all the sadness; they choke it out. When she looks out the window today, she realizes that the world around her is greening. She decides that she will too. She will choose joy.
3 comments
Read more